It’s a rather personal
experience and I have battled with the urge not to share it but I think a part of
me believes this will teach some mothers (especially the young ones and first
timers) a few things about child nutrition. Dare I say that it’s actually contrary
to what you’d be taught in antenatal classes and motherhood groups. I have to warn that you may want to skip this
post if you’re a lazy about reading because this promises to be a very long
Post.
How do I even start? Times like
this, the right words elude me. Straight to the point, when I had my first
daughter Olanma (God bless her), I had a caesarean birth, for some reason the breast
milk didn’t flow, being a first timer I didn’t know I was supposed to keep her
on the nipples to stimulate the flow (something ones mother would have taught
her). Also, due to the pains and discomfort associated with the healing process
I didn’t even try, until the health visitor came home after like 4-5 days and
then I told her I wasn’t still lactating. She was shocked and told me to always
keep her on the nipple. By this time my daughter was already used to formula
feeding, the implication was that the effort to get her to breastfeed was
fussier than bliss. She was frustrated, I was frustrated as I felt there was
something in my breast that made her cry rather than find succor. I nearly went
into depression (safe for the wonderful post natal care I received) as I
wondered why someone as BUSTY as I
am could not properly nurse a child. Little did I know that when it comes to
breast milk, big isn’t always better and size doesn’t even matter. To cut the long story short, we decided to do
a mix feeding for as long as was necessary and she was perfectly healthy.
Because of that experience, I
made up my mind I was going to start early and also exclusively breastfeed my
next child until at least six months. Along the line Kerenma came, From the
moment she was handed over to me, I started breastfeeding her, the milk supply
was still poor but I was excited she wasn’t fussy and anticipated a time that
the flow will improve and my little bundle of joy will start getting chubby
like the healthy kids I have seen exclusively breastfed.
First four days, it was like a
prayer answered, she added a few grams and I was overjoyed, but that Joy was short-lived
as I continued to observe that she
doesn’t ever get full, sometimes she sleeps off while nursing and wakes up the
next few minutes. I practically spent the whole day and night nursing but she
wasn’t thriving as much as expected.
We started meeting with lactation
consultants, whose professional advice was that baby latches on well, I on my
part was doing okay, generally the technique was superb. My breast was examined
and found to be fine too. So what the heck was the problem?
Having been satisfied okay, we returned to
Nigeria. Three to four months gone yet she hadn’t doubled her birth weight (see first photo).
Frequent trips to the hospitals and series of test revealed that she was
severely anemic. How could that be? Her parent’s genotypes were compatible.
The pediatrician also shared the same concern
about her weight, relations and older friends told me she had “NTA” ( a local parlance which means failure
to thrive) and/or NTIWA ISI (sunken skull) as the symptoms are characterized
by failure to thrive (see 1st photo). All
sorts of suggestions were made as to how to access treatment. If you’re not
strong willed, this kind of news will make you forget the many lessons you’ve
ever been taught, and whatever the doctors must have told you is thrown into
the garbage in desperate search for solution. This is desperation does not mean
you’re stupid, it just goes to show the extent to which parents to go to
protect their children. I am not going
to swank here that I didn’t fall for this, in fact, I fell for it with my neck
deep inside, my only luck was that I have a husband who is well read, exposed
and strong willed who insisted that I must not take his child to anywhere other
than a hospital neither will I administer any concoction in the name of herbal
treatment for NTA.
Tele-consultation with her doctor
oversea suggested that she wasn’t just getting enough from the breast milk (BM).
This ushered in another set of roller costar of emotions.
What was the problem with me? Why
can’t this
BIG BREAST of mine just
give enough nutrients to my child? At least she was willing why can’t I just
feed her enough? In frantic desperation for improvement and against the popular
sermon in the antenatal class about how great exclusive breastfeeding is we switched her to mix
feeding and within two days you could see the chubby cheeks, in less than a
week she doubled her birth weight (second photo), the next time we went to see her doctor he couldn’t
hide his surprise, he was so stunned at her transformation. We told him we switched her to mix feeding as
advised.
She just turned nine months old in this photo but already so
big she couldn't fit into her cloth size. (It’s not
like fat is the yardstick for measuring good health,
but coming from someone that has had slim and
chubby baby
you’d agree with me that
chubby and healthy looking babies are more attractive). It gives the parents a
sense of reward for the plenty sleep deprivations.
I am not a nutrition specialist
and I can’t claim I know half as much as I’d love to know but I want to state
that this experience has taught me that when it comes to breastfeeding and milk
supply, size is irrelevant and big doesn’t necessarily mean better. In fact,
less could be more. Always get a second opinion by seeing different specialist
on the same issue. The importance of prayers can’t be denied but there are times
that all you need is to take action or to channel the prayer to being directed
to the person that have solution to your problem.
Always remember, that your emotions and the
love you have for your child should not cloud your sense of reasoning and push
you to stupidity.
Despite
my excitement about the result of the test the GP asked me a very
interesting and unusual question; “do you want to keep it?” unusual because of my cultural
orientation... in Nigeria when you’re married and pregnant it can only
mean one thing, you’re keeping it. It took a while before I recovered
from the shocking question, Hell yea I want to
want to keep it. But curiously I asked her what other options I had,
(that’s after the realisation that advance in technology could actually
mean someone else carrying the pregnancy for me hit me). She went on to
explain my rights. I could decide to terminate it, a lot of people don’t
understand how powerful that question is but it also essentially rips
the unborn baby all it’s own power! Left at the mercy of the ADULT!
